The Blog of Jake Kelfer
Have you ever wondered what you should do when you first wake up in the morning? What about the last thing you do before you go to bed?
According to Jay Shetty, former Monk turned motivational icon, studies show 80% of us look at our phones first thing in the morning and the last thing we see at night. It causes our brains to constantly be ON.
Most of us spend hours lying in bed scrolling through Instagram. When we finally finish Instagram, we move onto Snapchat, Facebook or Twitter, and when we feel that we are updated, we go straight back to Instagram only to realize that we’ve been on our phone for 2 hours and should probably put it away so we can actually get some sleep.
Then when we wake up, the first thing we do is look at all the notifications we missed. If we don’t get any notifications, we immediately start our day off disappointed. If we do get notifications, we start our day in a frenzy trying to respond to everything and check every platform which can often lead to us being rushed causing more stress.
The problem we are facing is that we all claim we want to be happier, but we aren’t taking the action necessary to make it our reality.
So, what should we be doing then?
GOING TO SLEEP
One of the first things is to turn your phone on do not disturb before going to bed. Don’t worry, your mom can still get ahold of you if she needs to say good night (Go to settings and click allow calls from favorites).
You should set clear parameters with yourself which will increase your sleeping time and quality of sleep. I’ve also found that being on do not disturb reduces the anxiety or anticipation of a notification. Since you won’t hear the vibrate or the ping, you will slowly forget about it leading you to focus on the present rather than waiting for your next text message.
If you want to make sure you get your 8 hours of sleep, set your do not disturb for 9 hours. Yes, you will be okay not looking at your phone for 9 hours. That gives you an additional 30 minutes on both ends, going to sleep and waking up in the morning, to process your day and fill your mind with positive thoughts.
The key here isn’t to do this and then watch Netflix till you pass out. It’s to end your night and start your day off with a clear mind.
Another technique you can try, after your phone is on do not disturb 😉, is to reflect over the day’s events and try to remember some of your favorite moments. What was your favorite part of the day? Did you make someone else feel good? Did you accomplish what you wanted to? Did you close the deal you’ve been working on for the last 5 months?
If you are married or sleep with someone else, ask each other to recite the highs of your day.
Lastly, express your gratitude. Some people do this in the form of prayer while others simply close their eyes and think about all the things they are grateful for. How you choose to do it is up to you, but being grateful and noticing it is a powerful thought to end your day.
When you wake up, it’s in our nature to go straight to our phones, but I challenge you to hold off.
Instead, do a mini meditation, take a shower, brush your teeth, practice gratitude, or go to the bathroom before checking your phone. Take a few minutes for yourself before allowing technology to consume you for the next 16 hours of your day.
If you set your alarm with your phone, try this. Go on the clock app and when you set your alarm, set it with a personalized message so when you wake up the first thing you see is a positive message.
When I wake up with my alarm, it says, “It’s time for a GREAT day!” so the first thing I see is a positive message which sets the tone.
Or, listen to this crazy idea. Take a minute to appreciate the fact that you woke up and are alive. That in itself is an absolute WIN!
The last thing I’ll mention here is to create a vision of how the day is going to go. Imagine meeting your soulmate, getting a good grade on your test, building a relationship with a new client, etc.. Don’t ever forget that you control the narrative to your life.
The key is to start your day on your terms, not someone else’s. By giving yourself some ME time to start your morning you can get crystal clear before you hit the office or get your kids ready for school.
Elevate in Action:
I am a motivational speaker on a mission to inspire people to achieve their own definition of success and reach the highest level of personal success and happiness.